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LCH

LCH

Randomness in its true form--not unintelligible, just inconsistent.

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11.23.2001
 

About Me



Or some such crap. The "About Me" titles/articles are everywhere. Perhaps I don't want to focus on my life when I'm on here. I sit here in the same clothes that I was wearing yesterday. I sit here with hair that extends about two inches down my back. I see here, ironically eating No Man's Land beef jerky. Good stuff too.

I drink water. That's the only thing I drink. I can't stand the taste of wine or beer, although champagne is not half bad. The only things that I'm worrying about right now are whether or not it will rain today, and when will the family get home from shopping today.

I like listening to 80's pop. I like being home alone, where it doesn't matter how I look or what I do. I'm the only one around to hear or see it. It doesn't matter if I talk to myself or dance around or sing or act like a complete fool. And yet I fancy myself an intellectual. And for what? I use the word "And" too much, along with "So" and "But".

I like to read in bed, when everyone thinks I'm asleep. I like to daydream of being in far off places, with far off friends and far off identities. I like to dream that some of those people I know in everyday life are there as well, but that they have far off roles as well.

I like to think too much, about things that don't matter that much, and won't matter ten years from now or even a week. I don't know too much about grammar, except that which I've just picked over the past few years.

I like rain on Mondays and Saturdays. I don't like it to rain on Fridays, because that sends whole new worry about things into my mind. I don't like parades. I like band. I even like marching band, but not parades.

I can't [trust] understand people who won't let me go to the bathroom on long trips more than twice. *COUGHPAULCOUGH*

I like to watch movies and envision myself as a hero that comes by saves the whole lot of them. I don't like reality that much, except for nature. I like the outdoors, because there aren't any other distractions. I like music, because with it, I will always have a family somewhere.

I like interesting people, who make me think and don't let up.

I like thinking about weird things that happen when I'm rambling:

  1. Gone but not forgotten, but what about forgotten but not gone?
  2. There are two sides to all of us. The dark and the light.
  3. Which side is the true and which is the fake?
  4. Which side is the one we reveal to the world, while carefully guarding the other from ever being found out?
  5. There is ying and yang, male and female, light and dark. Hope and failure. Death and life. Helplessness and control.
  6. The world is opposites, all of it.
  7. People want to help. They try. They do the wrong things, they make things worse. As it always has been.
  8. The darkness supercedes the light. The shadow takes over and the light recedes. Which is the real and which is the fake? And which is the soul and which is the death? And what was the question, you couldn't remember to save your life? But the important things are all too accessible, but no one will listen?
  9. Friends are enemies and enemies are friends. And as Dick Tracy said, "The enemy of my enemy is my enemy."
  10. I feel like Two Face sometimes. Black and White. The gray exists, but isn't shown. We laugh at the pain of others. We cry alone at our own grievances.
  11. Pain exists and comfort resides in all, but where nothing is left, our futures loom.
  12. Droughts occur and other places flood. No happy medium.
  13. We look to the past for answers for our future, remembering our present. We lose our present to the future and try to live in the past. And we forget our past, and our present, all for our future. And we lose our future, because we forgot our past and now we don't understand our present. And the cycle continues. Ending, but lasting. Growing, but not continuing. Living, but not lasting.
  14. And on, and on, and on.


It's just a basic spewing of thoughts and ideals and worlds. Or maybe it's just the lack of oxygen to my brain.


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