At Least He's Faithful
Faithful? Yes. Crazy? Absolutely.
Why? Well, let me tell you a little story about a guy who took the Bible absolutely literally. In Matthew 18:8, it reads,
"If your hand or your foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life maimed or crippled than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into eternal fire.''
Oh bother. That was then, right? And anyway, I don't think that they were completely serious. But, gee, that's just a little over the top, don'tcha think? Oh wait, what am I talking about? Ah, I knew I forgot something. This guy, a 32-year-old Filipino farmer, thought that his penis was driving him to sin. So he tried to cut it off.
Ow??? Pain? Eek?
You know, I think that there was a guy who went on Jerry Springer who did a thing just like that. But he did it with garden shears.
Ow?
Still On This Subject, But. . .
. . .you know that there is a difference between Southern Baptists and just regular Baptists, right? Well, there is according to my family. Southern Baptists are those people who takes the Bible completely literally. For example, they are the ones who people that there is an order to things. God is first. Okay, that's agreed on. Man is second. And Woman is very far behind and should do whatever Man wants, because she is totally inferior.
Uh huh. Okay then.
With that same reasoning, don't you think that all Southern Baptists should be as crazy as the guy who cut off his penis? Shouldn't they be cutting off their hands and whatnot? You don't choose to believe what you want from the Bible, and forget about the rest of it. If you are taking the Bible totally literal, then you have to believe everything.
Okay.
I Happen To Think That I Am A Pretty Good Customer
The only thing I might ever do, might be not putting something back in its right place. But that might also be because I can't find it's right spot.
This person works in retail. It's a very long rant about all the things that customers do to make employees want to kill people.
posted by Val at 12/10/2001 04:26:00 PM
